March 17

Psalm 51 Verse 6: Indeed, I have been wicked from my birth, a sinner from my mother’s womb.

It is disheartening to think I have been a selfish, ego-centric person from my birth. When I think about my children and grandchildren, I understand how each of them, in order to survive, had to be self-serving as infants. We then teach, train, or cajole them into sharing and thinking other people’s needs, as well as, or even before, their own. Which one of us has not acted such that another person, a family member or friend, has been hurt emotionally? I know I have. The real test for me is not hurting people I do not know. Random people along a street can be subjected to my wrath for walking slowly in front of me, impeding my progress. I don’t really lash out at them physically, but I do think evil thoughts about their upbringing or mental acuity. In the car a driver ahead of me who carelessly alters my direction can initiate a verbal barrage of words that my passengers may take unkindly umbrage. I have to be careful to not teach my grandson new and exciting expletives. I really want that to be someone else’s prerogative. I am an admitted sinner. Daily I ask forgiveness of these atrocities I commit. God understands I am a sinner. In my defense, I am trying to lessen the number of evil thought each day of my life. I hope I will be ready to face my Lord with a clean heart and mind on the last day of my existence on this blue marble. Heaven can wait until I have zero evil thoughts, can’t it?